At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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