She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
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