the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
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