So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
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