return my video game
Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
only if we run a train.
done.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
