I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Randomize
