Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
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