Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
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