Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize
