Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize