We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
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