So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
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