Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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