Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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