So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
