quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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