I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
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I drank myself into bisexuality again.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
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Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize