haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
apparently the secret to your success is patron
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
