I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
