she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Randomize
