I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
