Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize