Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
i just google imaged poop.
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Randomize