he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
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