let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
I smell like Dick and happiness
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
