i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Randomize
