My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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