i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?