Porn is love you can see.
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Randomize