why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
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