we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
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Don't worry. I has chaperone.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
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Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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