Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
