Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
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