Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
