i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
