my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
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