You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
