worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
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he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
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What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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