Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
