your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Randomize
