she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
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