i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize