You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize
