...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
