she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
