That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
