This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Randomize
