I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
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