Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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