I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
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