No awkward lesbian experiences without me
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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